Showing posts with label Karate Kid. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Karate Kid. Show all posts

Tuesday, December 2, 2008

BCS... Really?

'Yes it's true... this man has no d*ck'.



That's Dan Beebe (not to be confused with Don, or that show Bebe's Kids which tens of people saw).  He's a bagadouche.

Here's what D Beebs and his crew from 'usually over-rated but actually tight this year' Big 12 (note: the Holy Roman Empire should have no impact on collegiate football.  Further, the use of Roman Numerals is awkward in general and is something that overly 'look how smart I am people' use to keep the rest of us down. Use numbers bruh.) did:

They couldn't decide who should play for the Big 12 title game against Missouri.  3 teams, Oklahoma, Texas, and Texas Technical University (note: It's actually just 'Tech'.  Isn't 'tech' an abbreviation for something?  Like, 'he's a tech guy', 'Tek from Real World, 'I'll deploy the Technobots).  So the rich men who are made rich by the BCS, waited for the BCS rankings to come out, and summarily decided that Oklahoma should play in the Conference Championship Game.

Forget the corruption, back-room glad-handing, and millions of dollars changing hands.  This is a gutless move.  This is the conference waiting for someone else to share their opinion, then coming out and saying: 'yes... well, we agreed all along.'  Without gut.  Here are some other gutless actions:

-Lou Diamond Phillips saying that Meg Ryan was dead in 'Courage Under Fire'.  Hard for us to criticize LDP, dude was Chavez in Young Guns, one of our favorite movies ever.  But come on bruh.

-The decision to release Final Fantasy 13 on XBOX 360.  There are XBOX people and there are PS 3 people.  They can hang out and play the other system but it is NOT cool for the signature games to just walk across to the other system.  This isn't 'red rover'.  The FF series is a Playstation series, just the same way that Halo is an XBOX thing.  Oil and water.

-The sensei from Karate Kid finding another karate guy and trying to ruin Daniel-san's life.  The kid won the All-Valley Karate Tournament.  Let it go broseph.

-Andy Reid passing a note to someone else who had to pass it to Donovan Mcnabb.  The note read: 

'Do you think you're benched?

Yes ______

No______'

-Lindsay Lohan going lesbian.  Just chicken.

-The people that make those top 100 video countdowns and always disrespect 'Smooth Criminal'.  Never gets talked about.  #1 in our opinion.


-Comedians who say 'Give it up for the ladies!'

-People not from New York who root for the Yankees.

-Networks who get all uppity about their content on youtube.  God forbid people see shows they like.  No I do not think there will be more traffic to cbs.com because it's the only place you can find NCIS.  Chooch.

-McDonald's for buying Roy Rogers and not keeping all the Roy Rogerses open.  The Frisco Bacon Cheeseburger is the greatest fast food sandwich of all time.  Unacceptable that it's gone.

Who's Got More?




Thursday, October 23, 2008

Rock Band vs Guitar Hero vs Video Games


Here's the World Series of 'crossover' video games: Rock Band vs. Guitar Hero.  

What's a crossover game?  Great question interested reader.  A crossover game is a video game that makes people who don't normally play video games, want to play.  It's the ultimate goal of tons of industries to achieve crossover.  When something moves from niche to pop culture, someone gets rich.

Example: Who's Tim Gunn?

You know don't you?  I know.  There is absolutely no reason you should know who this guy is.  









He doesn't do anything that affects a single person who would ever read this blog.  And yet, we can all spout off a catch phrase.

What's the point?  The point is, games like RB and GH, while fun, are really about something else.  They are about a bunch of fairweather, johnny-come-lately, casual fans sauntering into my dojo and telling me that fear exists.  Umm bruh?  Fear does not exist in this dojo.



So, while I enjoy playing some Rock Band with some friends in a social setting, I don't like what it stands for.  Gus Johnson's Whisper, like Gus Johnson himself, is a gamer.  I don't play video games with chicks in the room.  I don't want to play something that Julie can be decent at.  I sit alone in a dark, cool, and calm place trying to rescue princesses.  That's how I roll.  What's that?  Zelda is in trouble?  No problem.  I'm in because the cartridge is gold.

Huh?  Sephiroth is loose?  Lemme get a group together.

Does that tomb look raided to you?  Me neither.  I'll raid it with the hot chick that isn't crazy.
 

There are others like me.  You can call them old school.  You can call them dorks (GJW note: there is a difference between a dork and a nerd.  A nerd is good academically and follows the rules.  A dork is someone, like me, who can tell you things like this: Yoda uses a form of light saber combat called Ataru, the names of the next door neighbors on Alf were Trevor and Raquel Okmanek (sp), the 1987 Minnesota Twins batting order was most often 1-Dan Gladden 2-Greg Gagne 3-Kirby Puckett 4-Kent Hrbeck 5-Gary Gaetti 6-Roy Smalley 7-Tom Brunansky 8-Steve lombardozzi 9-Sal Butera/Tim Laudner.  No disrespect to Al Newman who got a ton of ABs as a platoon guy.).

We'll put on our smiley face and strum the guitar but we want you to see these games for what they are.  The game developers want casual fans.  Do we?  I just don't know.